Sometimes it’s so much easier to preach than to practice. I noticed a disconnect between my words and actions the other day. I’m calling myself out here because (a) it’s cheaper than therapy and (b) there might be a little nugget in the story that will help you, too.

I hate it when I screw stuff up, especially when it comes to relationships.

I once sent a not-so-nice email to a colleague I’ll call Randy. I did it after I got a fervent complaint from a new client about him. Randy was negotiating a speaking fee on my behalf and, from the client’s perspective, took a firm stand in a way that did not go over well. The client said something triggering for me: “Randy could stand to learn from you about doing business in a trustworthy way.” Cue the entrance of my high horse.

It’s that time of year again. Holiday and year-end celebrations are approaching at lightning speed, which means a high probability you’re negatively anticipating, or even dreading, being with a certain family member. Or two. Or more. A politically-charged climate makes this 100 times harder.

Last week’s story about my latest embarrassing moment (and subsequent muted stupor) reminded me of a favorite Charlie Green story, which concludes with very specific tips for how to deal with awkward silence in a trust-building way.

I ran into someone the other day who recognized me but couldn’t figure out why. I didn’t have the courage to help him out. I was reminded of an important trust lesson in the process.