This post is part of our Monthly-ish Tips series.Five simple ways to sell more without selling at all

Selling* that’s productive, rewarding, and relationship-centric is much simpler than most of us make it out to be. It requires the right attitude (serve others, not your own goals) with the right objective (build long-term relationships and the sales will come) along with a steady focus (take small steps, consistently over time).

*Substitute “business development” if you prefer the euphemism.

Here’s a recently upgraded list of five other-centric, relationship-building actions that have the potential to generate more business, just not the goal of generating more business:

  1. Call a past client or colleague with no agenda other than to say hello. This is mind-bendy one because it seems so very wrong to those of us who were taught to reach out only when you have something “of value.” We just weren’t taught that our caring alone has value—and is also an extraordinary differentiator. When you simply want to say hello, with no expectation of anything in return, the clients who haven’t made time for you in months are often right there. More detailed suggestions for exactly how to do this effectively and powerfully can be found here.
  2. Send something handwritten. I know I’m not the only one who feels a little giddy when I sift through my mail pile and see may name in someone’s actual hand-writing. in today’s low-touch, technology-driven business world a long-hand note of thanks or appreciation is a striking differentiator. (Thank you, Mom, for all those thank-you notes you made me write as a kid.) All the better if you make a little extra effort to track down a good snail mail address, though for the record I’ve been on the receiving end of a handwritten note that was scanned and emailed—and loved it.
  3. Ask if it’s OK to introduce them to someone in your network who is beneficial to them (not you). The point: take yourself out of the picture. Do something that benefits others, and only for that reason. Be sure to get everyone’s OK first so you know your offer is welcomed and well timed.
  4. Invite them for a meal or informal touch-base … six months from now. Not one month, or three months, but six months—long enough that signals you’re playing the long game. If this feels like a strange thing to do, then caveat it, rather than avoid it: “I know this may seem like an odd request. I’d love to pencil in time for us to meet up in January. It will be here before we know it. And I want to be sure we stay in touch.” Don’t be surprised if you get an immediate reply like this one (as long as your motives stay pure): “Good idea. Only let’s get together much sooner as well. I’ve got some work you might be interested in.”
  5. _______________________. This one is dealer’s choice. Fill in the blank with something you would enjoy.

Think of these as five ways to connect differently and use this list regularly. Try monthly to start if weekly seems too daunting.

Then prepare to be surprised at how easy and fun relationship-driven “selling” can be.

Make It Real
This week, choose one action from the list and schedule time to get it done. Bonus points if you pause and do it right now.

Learn More
Discover four more long-term relationship best practices in Chapter 11 of The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook.

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Andrea Howe

As the founder of The Get Real Project, I am the steward of our vision and our service offerings, as well as a workshop leader and keynote speaker. Above all else, I am an entrepreneur on a mission: to kick conventional business wisdom to the curb and transform how people work together as a result. I am also the co-author, with Charles H. Green, of The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook (Wiley, 2012).