This post is part of our Weekly Tips series.
If you’re a golfer, you just shook your head in dismay because you know what my strategy will yield: a nice left hook into a thick forest of trees.
Trust is like golf: neither makes sense. They’re both rife with paradox, and the more we try to insist on bringing logic to the game, the less effective we’ll be.
Off the green, the thing you’re most afraid to say or do is precisely what will build the most trust. The best way to gain credibility is to admit what you do not know. The best way to close more deals is to stop trying to close more deals.
In other words, play it safe or hype your expertise or Always Be Closing and you slice the ball; take risks, be honest, relax … and land it square on the green.
Trust is vexing in this way. It’s also fascinating (at least to me) because of its seeming trickery.
Bottom line: it’s ridiculously simple to build more trust: embrace its paradoxical nature by making a point to do the opposite of what your baser instincts tell you to do.
Make It Real
This week, notice when your baser instincts get triggered: fight or flight, self-preservation, the instinct to win. If you can shift the dynamic in the moment, great. If not, that’s OK; self-awareness is nine-tenths of the battle. Are there patterns in your own reactions and behavior? What sparks a less trustworthy reaction for you?
Learn More
- Read more about the Three Ps of trust, or find out how one global firm won back a major client with a bold and paradoxical move in Chapter 3 of The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook: A Comprehensive Toolkit for Leading with Trust.
Andrea Howe
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