It’s that time of year again. There’s a good chance you have holiday or year-end celebrations ahead, and a high probability you’re negatively anticipating—maybe even dreading—being with a family member or two. A politically-charged climate only makes this 10 times harder.

Last week’s tip focused on 10 negotiations pitfalls. This week offers a very specific checklist to use at your next negotiation. Live by each tenet and you’ll distinguish yourself not as a “good negotiator,” but as someone who negotiates from and with trust:

You may know the parable about two monkeys and one banana that vividly illustrates the way negotiations usually play out. Being monkeys, they both want the banana. They struggle briefly and the banana gets ripped in two. One proceeds to peel his half of the banana and eat the skin, while the other throws away the peel and just eats the meat inside.

Last week’s post on faking it less reminded me of a phenomenon I once read about called “Athlete Talk.” Not sports talk; this is different. I find myself guilty of it sometimes, and wonder if you do too.